Two years ago today was my first day on the job as Kathleen.
Looking back I have to ask myself, how did I find the guts to do that? I’d been working nearly 8 years for the Shared Services Center office of the New York Times.
I planned carefully, worked with my therapist, and got my name changed. Then I made an appointment with the local HR person. When I told her, I proposed a transition date 6 weeks away, after the Christmas and New Years’ holidays, and I offered to use the rest room on another floor for a few months. She handled my announcement well, and promised to get back to me.
The New York Times was not a novice when it came to dealing with transgendered. The local manager saw no need to wait, and we set a date 2 weeks in the future (December 19, 2007). And, they told me, there would be no need for me to use any non-standard restroom.
I had already scheduled vacation for Monday and Tuesday (the 17th and 18th), so I was to show up on Wednesday ready to go. My coworkers were told on Monday. They were ready for me, and I guess I was ready for them.
I was excited, but also confident. I had a deep conviction that beginning to live — and work — full time as Kathleen was the next step in my journey. What I saidabove about “finding the guts”, well, I’d already found them when I accepted that God created me transgendered, and that I was as perfect, whole, and complete as all creation.
I make it sound easy. It was actually easier for me than for my partner. Let me see if she will make an entry herself.
20 December 2009 at 21:16
Since you insist, here’s my version.
Up until a couple of months before the transition, I had assumed that I would just go on as usual. Conversations at Fantasia Fair helped me realize that I couldn’t have my husband disappear without comment. So I informed my bosses at work.
My workplace was indeed a novice at all this. I basically insisted that I was going to make group announcements to my peers and staff. It was a strange experience and I was surprised by who was supportive. However, I am just fine if people don’t want to hear about my personal life as long as we can go on working as always. I have not made much mention of Kathleen except to those I know are OK with it.
We did go the the staff Christmas party this year together, which may have been exciting to some who attended. I am still puzzled about how much to say to people. I hoped that gossip would do the work, but unfortunately no one tells how much they’ve heard, so I just don’t know.
Overall, I feel liberated. I’ve gotten involved with GLBT groups locally and professionally. I am pleased to have been the mover behind the American Library Association taking a position in support of an inclusive ENDA. So, while I am very happy for Kathleen, I am also happy for me.